For a father living separately, it's easy to fall into pessimism. The child is far away, the ex-wife is plotting, there's not enough money. But research shows: optimism is the main weapon of a father in the fight for healthy relationships with children. We tell you how a positive attitude affects children now and in 20 years.

Optimism as a magnet

When a father doesn't complain on the phone about life, doesn't criticize the mother, but tells with a smile how his week went, the child is drawn to him. A ten-year-old child is not interested in disputes and alimony. He wants to see his father strong and cheerful. An optimistic dad gives a sense of stability.

Effect on self-esteem

Children of divorced parents often blame themselves: "Dad left because I'm bad." The father's optimism ("I'm glad we can spend time together," "You'll succeed") breaks this fear. The child grows up with the feeling that he is valuable and loved, regardless of the family structure.

Influence on future relationships

Children who see an optimistic dad in front of them, even if he lives separately, adopt the model of a positive attitude towards difficulties. When they grow up, they are not afraid to create families, do not expect a partner to stab them in the back. The father's optimism heals generational wounds.

How to maintain optimism when everything is bad

Don't lie, but shift the focus: "Yes, Mom upset me, but it has nothing to do with you." Find small joys in communication: "Today we fixed the bike together." Praise yourself for your efforts, even if they are not appreciated.
© library.ee

Permanent link to this publication: